do you think long distance relationships work? how about starting off in close proximity and then to ldr? or starting off as ldr? what is your view on this? -sugoi
good question. Sorry for the delay, I was jammed up with programming assignments and such. Anyway, Long Distance Relationships definitely put a huge strain on any relationship. The holding power of such a relationship depends on the situation and is not recommended for couples who are not willing to commit themselves to be faithful and truthful. With that said, the main reason why LDR's are unsuccessful (there are exceptions to the rule) is because one or both parties are not prepared for the long stretches of time without live contact. Speaking to one another every evening on the phone is a poor replacement for face-to-face conversations. The one characteristic that defines a quality relationship is its ability to foster growth among both parties through time. With LDR's, the growth happens at a much slower rate and there is little chance for both parties to form new experiences in the context of one another. This results in individual growth and an increasing seperation among parties.
There is hope for couples who wish to grow together even if they are hundreds of miles apart. Here are some tips:
-get free mobile-to-mobile minutes. Nothing worse that checking your phone bill and realizing 75% of your calls are to that special somebody which is costing you a special penalty fee every month.
-plan to visit one another at least once every two months. Talk is cheap and love wilters without physical contact
-avoid temptations. If you're serious about making your LDR work, try to avoid places where single people meet people. I'm not saying dont have fun, but at the very least bring one or two friends who can cockblock for you.
-have a picture of that person in a location where you know you'll look at it daily. As the saying goes: Out of Sight, Out of Mind.
Good luck with your relationship. If anything, make plans for one person to change locations and move closer to the other. LDR's are for temporary situations only and it is foolish to try to sustain a relationship where the other person is absent from your life for too long.
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