It always begins the same way. He just had to catch the last segment on ESPN’s Behind the Line, and now they’re stuck at Jack in the Box eating the two for $.99 tacos because of a missed reservation at the fancy Mediterranean restaurant. But he casually mentions that the only reason the TV was even on was to kill time while she applied her second layer of foundation to cover up that pesky dry patch underneath her jaw-line. She retorts that the dirty underwear you conveniently left in the bathroom was not going to pick itself up and she’s glaring at him so intently he fears that his face will melt like Coldstone’s on a July sidewalk.
Yeah, we’ve all been there. The facts all lead to the ultimate conclusion that it was actually her fault. The only thing left after this CSI investigation of blame is David Caruso tilting his head and shoving on that pair of mini-mart sunglasses offering a witty one-liner to end the scene. The problem is, that championship feeling one gets after a lopsided victory seems bitter and cold. Why? It’s because the lady is pissed. And we know what that means.
Doghouse.
So let’s back this pain train up for a minute. In reality, anything that’s blamed on her is actually a test. She’s trying to determine the type of man that would call out a compassionate, kind, and generous individual like herself. Boy, did he just fail that one. Many a man has fell flat on his face when the oral exam of blame comes up. All he needed to do was to fess up and let her know that yes, it was indeed his fault for everything. That simple gesture would have saved 3 hours of negotiation and a bouquet of flowers/box of candies/stuffed bear holding a heart with the words “I love you beary much”.
Yes, it is a lose/lose situation trying to argue with her assessment. Females are not accustomed to working in the realm of “logic” and “facts”. This type of reasoning does not hold a candle to her arbitrary judgment system. It is pretty much her way or the highway. So unless one plans on being celibate for the rest of his life, commit this to memory: She’s always right.
Deal with it.
*sigh*
Dude. This is the most p-whipped post ever. Take that shit off of a pedestal! If you are a 20-something guy, and some chick is giving you shit about not taking her to a restaurant in time and leaving your underwear on the floor, you dump her and you dump her fast. She’s a selfish broad and all you are seeing is the tip of the iceburg.